I am so far behind, guys. I still haven’t written up my article about Adventure 11, and here I am, fresh off Adventure 14. I promise I’ll get into all the details when I finally sit down to write it, but for now, let me just say: I ate so much pussy this weekend my jaw is legit sore.

Now, servicing one of my wife’s friends while she watches on FaceTime has become, let’s say, a routine thing. But this time? The friend’s husband was watching too. And he was not happy. Honestly, I was just glad he was also on FaceTime and not standing in my damn living room. Dude was giving me some serious death stares through the screen. I really, really hope he doesn’t know where I live.

Anyway, I’ll catch you up on all the adventures soon. For now, I’m going to ice my jaw and pray that angry husbands stay far, far away.