Madam has been traveling for a while now, and somewhere during her trip she decided duckie needed improvement.

that improvement arrived in the form of a giant, terrifyingly expensive espresso machine that got shipped directly to the estate with a simple note attached:

“improve your coffee game.”

apparently while visiting one of her friends, Madam discovered that friend’s submissive makes incredible coffee with one of these machines. and yes, i got instantly jealous. somewhere out there is another service boy earning praise through caffeine craftsmanship, and suddenly i took this very personally.

so while Madam has been away, i have been locked in combat with this stainless steel demon.

day one was catastrophic.

i somehow sprayed steamed milk across half the kitchen. then i packed the espresso grounds too tightly and the machine made a horrible choking sound like it was dying in agony. at one point foam blasted directly into my own face hard enough that i yelped.

that was when Cook walked in.

she stared at the mess. stared at me. stared at the machine.

then she smacked me on the shoulder with a wooden spoon and informed me that the coffee machine “cost more than you make in a year, boy.”

which honestly felt fair.

day two was not much better. i made espresso so strong it felt medically dangerous. Cook took one sip, blinked twice, and asked if i was trying to strip paint off the walls. later i somehow overflowed the drip tray without noticing, so i ended up naked on the kitchen floor mopping up coffee while questioning my life choices.

but then something shifted.

i started understanding the machine. the sounds. the timing. the grind size. the steaming wand stopped feeling like a weapon and started behaving like a tool. i watched tutorials. i took notes. i became completely obsessed.

and then last night, it happened.

perfect crema.

i literally gasped.

rich espresso. smooth foam. balanced flavor. beautiful little golden layer floating on top like coffee heaven itself. i stood there in the kitchen staring at the cup like i had just completed a sacred ritual.

Cook tasted it.

she narrowed her eyes suspiciously. took another sip. then nodded once.

which from Cook is basically a standing ovation.

this morning i made another perfect one. then another.

and honestly? i think i finally have the damn thing figured out.

Madam comes home soon.

duckie will be ready.