So, I had an experience last night that really tested me as a cuck. My girlfriend has been seeing this new guy—already been with him twice—and last night was the first time I was ordered to watch. Now, normally, I’m all about this. It’s literally my thing. But here’s the problem: this dude? Absolute asshole.

I’ve been doing this long enough to know that not every bull is going to be my best friend. That’s not the point. I don’t need to like the guy—hell, I don’t even need to respect him, as long as she does. But this one? He made it really hard. He wasn’t just confident or dominant. He was straight-up rude, dismissive, and arrogant in a way that made my skin crawl. The kind of guy who talks down to everyone in the room, like he’s the center of the universe. And worse, he seemed to be getting off on making me feel like shit, like his whole kink was about humiliation, but not the kind my girlfriend and I enjoy—it was mean, like he wanted to break me down as a person rather than play within the boundaries we’ve set.

It got me thinking—what do you do when, as a cuck, you can’t stand the guy your girlfriend or wife is using as a bull? What happens when the dynamic stops being about submission and pleasure and turns into you just straight-up hating the dude in the room?

First off, it’s important to remember that being a cuck doesn’t mean being miserable. Yeah, we’re wired differently, and we get off on things that a lot of people wouldn’t understand, but that doesn’t mean we have to accept every situation blindly. If the bull is actively ruining the experience, if he’s breaking the unspoken rules of respect, if he’s making you feel unsafe or legitimately unhappy in a way that doesn’t turn you on—then you have the right to speak up.

Now, that doesn’t mean throwing a fit in the middle of the session. That’s not our place, and it’s not the move. But it does mean having a real conversation with your partner after the fact. If the experience left you feeling angry or hollow instead of aroused and fulfilled, that’s something to address. Talk to her about it. Tell her what felt off. If she values your submission, your role, and your well-being in this dynamic, she’s going to listen.

And if she doesn’t? If she waves it off or tells you to just deal with it? Well… that’s a bigger problem. Being a cuck doesn’t mean being disposable. If she’s choosing partners who actively make you miserable and doesn’t care how it affects you, that’s not dominance. That’s neglect. That’s disrespect. And I hate to break it to you, but if that’s happening, you need to start asking yourself some serious questions about where you stand in this relationship.

Not every bull is going to be a perfect fit. But you deserve a dynamic where you can thrive, not one where you’re just suffering because you think that’s what submission is supposed to be.

At the end of the day, we do this because it works for us. And if it’s not working, something has to change.