It’s officially the holidays, and most of the team is offline. Mizz Geena is mostly away, though we’re still working on some back-and-forth to keep building out her new Online Domination & Submissive Training program. Mistress Heather and Miss Autumn are both taking time off, and Shawn and Levi are gone until the New Year. And, of course, Madam Nora and duckie are off soaking up the sun on their vacation.

So here I am, part of the skeleton crew holding things together while everyone else is away. And you know what that means? I’ve been given the delightful task of monitoring duckie’s email, which is the main account for all incoming magazine correspondence.

Let me tell you—nobody should have to go through duckie’s email. It is terrifying. The sheer volume of weirdness that comes in is enough to make your skin crawl. And I’m not talking about random mailing list stuff (though those are bad enough—I just ignore them). I’m talking about personal contacts, people he regularly communicates with online. These folks are into some seriously bizarre shit.

Every time I log out of his email, I feel the need to scrub my brain. I am so, so glad that I don’t have to sit at duckie’s desk and use his keyboard to login to his email…

So yeah, happy holidays to me. Send help.