Canadians really do make the most thankful subs. I’ve got a boy in every port, but there’s one west coast city I visit often, and that’s where ‘pete’ comes in. Always eager, always polite, always ready to open his door—and his mouth.

No matter what I do to him—ruin his weekend plans, trash his perfectly clean apartment, leave his back marked and trembling—he still says thank you. And he means it. That sweet, grateful tone, even when he’s a bruised mess on the floor? Chef’s kiss.

And if something’s not quite right? If I raise an eyebrow? He’s already apologizing and scrambling to fix it. That classic Canadian “sorry,” but desperate and submissive—my favorite kind.

Honestly, if more men acted like pete, the world would be a much more obedient place. Canadian boys, keep doing what you’re doing. Or better yet—get on your knees and do what I want.