Mrs. Claus and the Giant Candycane Strap
It happened one winter on Christmas Eve,
A gift wrapped in ribbon that Santa could not believe.
Mrs. Claus opened the box with a grin,
And lifted a strapon striped bright as sin.
Red and white swirls from the base to the tip,
Thick as a thermos, built for a trip.
She held it up high with a sparkle of cheer,
Saying, “Looks like I get my own toy this year.”
Santa turned pale, his cookies went cold,
But he bent right over like a husband who obeys when told.
She strapped in tight, gave one testing thrust,
And Santa discovered new kinds of trust.
He yelped, he gasped, he clutched the bed,
Mrs. Claus laughed and kissed his head.
“Such good behavior. Such holiday joy.
But I am not done. Bring me each toy boy.”
She called for the elves by the firelight glow,
And one by one they lined up in a row.
First came Twizzle who trembled a lot,
He left with legs shaking and face burning hot.
Next came Pippin who bragged he was tough,
He squeaked like a mouse when she pushed in enough.
Then Jingle arrived with confidence wide,
He left with eyes crossed and a wobbly stride.
One after another they took that cane,
Each elf learning pleasure can blend with pain.
Mrs. Claus kept a rhythm both ruthless and sweet,
Turning the workshop into a spanking heartbeat.
By dawn they were sprawled in exhausted delight,
Moaning soft carols all through the night.
Mrs. Claus wiped down her candycane prize,
Still glowing with power in her satisfied eyes.
So Santa may bring the gifts each year,
But Mrs. Claus brings holiday cheer.
Thanks to that strapon so festive and strong,
Every elf learned Christmas can last all night long.
Latest Comments