When I was first offered the opportunity to be Mistress Amanda’s Summer Intern Submissive, I knew this experience would be unlike anything I had ever encountered. What I didn’t realize was how deeply it would affect me, shaping not only my understanding of submission but also my outlook on life and my future ambitions. This essay reflects on the lessons I learned, the highs and lows of the summer, and how this internship has profoundly influenced my plans for the future.

Lessons in Submission and Obedience

The most valuable lesson I learned this summer was the true meaning of submission. Under Mistress Amanda’s guidance, I discovered that submission is not just about following orders; it’s about fully embracing one’s role with dedication, humility, and a willingness to serve. Mistress Amanda’s strict yet nurturing approach taught me that submission is a powerful tool for personal growth. Through her meticulous training, I learned to anticipate her needs, respond to her commands without hesitation, and strive for excellence in every task, no matter how small.

Another crucial lesson was the importance of discipline and self-control. Mistress Amanda’s expectations were clear, and meeting them required unwavering focus and resilience. Whether it was enduring intense physical trials or mastering the art of serving her and her guests, I had to push my limits and overcome my own weaknesses. This discipline extended to all aspects of my life, helping me develop a stronger sense of self-control that I will carry with me long after this internship ends.

An additional lesson that I didn’t anticipate was the importance of adaptability in submission. Throughout the summer, Mistress Amanda introduced me to new experiences and challenges that were often unexpected. I learned that being a good submissive means not only following orders but also being able to adjust quickly to new situations, always staying attuned to her needs and desires. This adaptability became a vital part of my service, ensuring that I could meet her expectations no matter what circumstances arose.

The Highs: Moments of Achievement and Connection

One of the most rewarding aspects of this internship was the deep connection I formed with Mistress Amanda. Our relationship was built on trust, mutual respect, and a shared understanding of the roles we each played. There were several high points throughout the summer, but one that stands out was my participation in Mistress Amanda’s annual Summer CBT Bash. Competing alongside other submissives, I endured intense physical challenges, ultimately emerging as the last one standing. The pride I felt in that moment was indescribable, knowing that I had not only met but exceeded Mistress Amanda’s expectations.

Another high point was my “Oral Graduation” ceremony. After weeks of rigorous training, I finally achieved the level of skill Mistress Amanda demanded in oral pleasure. The ceremony was a celebration of my progress, and I felt immense satisfaction knowing that I had earned Mistress Amanda’s approval. The moment when Megan, Mistress Amanda’s trusted assistant, awarded me my diploma was particularly special, as it marked a significant milestone in my journey as a submissive.

A new high point that particularly resonated with me was when Mistress Amanda entrusted me with the task of hosting and serving at an intimate dinner she held for a few of her closest friends. This was the first time I was responsible for overseeing every detail of an event, from preparing the meal to ensuring her guests were fully satisfied. The evening went flawlessly, and Mistress Amanda’s praise afterward was a moment I will never forget. It was a testament to the trust she had in me, and it reinforced my commitment to serving her to the best of my abilities.

The Lows: Facing My Shortcomings

Of course, the summer was not without its challenges. The most difficult moments were those where I fell short of Mistress Amanda’s expectations. One such instance was when I failed to maintain control during an intimate encounter with one of Mistress Amanda’s guests, resulting in a premature climax that left both Mistress Amanda and the guest disappointed. The weight of my failure was heavy, and the subsequent punishment—a week in chastity, deprived of the ability to please Mistress Amanda—was a harsh but necessary lesson in self-control and the importance of meeting the standards set for me.

A particularly challenging low point came when I was tasked with a complex organizational project that involved preparing Mistress Amanda’s estate for a large event. Despite my best efforts, I made several mistakes that led to delays and added stress for Mistress Amanda. The disappointment in her voice, when she addressed my shortcomings, was worse than any physical punishment. It was a stark reminder of the high standards I must uphold, and it drove home the lesson that attention to detail and precision are critical in my role as her submissive.

One of My Proudest Moments

One of the proudest moments of my internship wasn’t just about achieving a task or receiving praise—it was about enduring the intense physical punishment Mistress Amanda needed to dole out. There was a day when external frustrations from her work life spilled over into our dynamic. Mistress Amanda needed an outlet for her anger, and I became that outlet. Tied securely to the St. Andrew’s cross in the courtyard, I braced myself for what was to come.

The punishment was severe. Each strike of her whip tore through my skin, sending waves of excruciating pain throughout my body. My back, my legs, even my chest—no part of me was spared. But through it all, I never used my safeword. I never begged her to stop. I knew that Mistress Amanda needed this release, and I was determined to withstand it for her. With every lash, I focused on the knowledge that I was serving a greater purpose by helping her release her frustrations. The physical pain was overwhelming, but the sense of pride in being able to take it for her was even stronger.

By the end of the session, my body was battered and bruised, but my spirit was intact. Mistress Amanda’s words of gratitude afterward were more rewarding than anything else. I had proven my resilience, my dedication, and my unwavering commitment to her. This experience, though painful, was a powerful reminder of the depths of my submission and my ability to endure whatever Mistress Amanda required of me. It remains one of the moments I am most proud of, not because of the physical endurance it required, but because of the emotional strength I demonstrated in supporting my Mistress when she needed it most.

What I’ll Miss Most

As I prepare to return to college, I’ve been reflecting on what I’ll miss most about my time here with Mistress Amanda. There are so many things I’ll miss—the comfort of command, the clarity of knowing my place, and the deep satisfaction of a job well done. I’ll miss the structured days, where every moment had purpose and every task brought me closer to fulfilling Mistress Amanda’s desires.

I’ll also miss the physical sensations—the taste of Mistress Amanda, the feel of her whip, the intense pleasure that came with her approval. There’s a unique pride that comes with knowing I’ve served her well, that I’ve met her high standards. I’ll miss the camaraderie with the staff, the playful teasing, and even the challenges that pushed me to my limits.

But what I’ll miss most of all is simply Mistress Amanda herself—every piece of her. She’s become my everything this summer—my guide, my teacher, my disciplinarian, my pleasure, my purpose. I live off of her presence, her voice, her touch. The thought of not waking up to her commands or feeling her eyes on me is daunting. She’s been my world these past few months, and I’m afraid of how difficult it will be to adjust to a life without her constant presence. Mistress Amanda has shaped me into the submissive I am today, and I know that leaving her will leave a void that no one else can fill.

Shaping My Future: A Path Forward

This internship has been transformative, not only in terms of my understanding of submission but also in how I view my future. Mistress Amanda’s guidance has instilled in me a deep appreciation for the power dynamics in a Domme/submissive relationship, and I now see submission as a path to personal growth and fulfillment. The discipline, resilience, and skills I have developed this summer will serve me well in all areas of my life, both in and out of the BDSM community.

Looking ahead, I am more committed than ever to continuing my journey as a submissive. Whether that means seeking out new opportunities to serve or further honing my skills under Mistress Amanda’s mentorship, I know that this experience has set me on a path that I am eager to explore. The lessons I’ve learned, the highs I’ve experienced, and the lows I’ve overcome have all contributed to a stronger, more confident version of myself.

In conclusion, my summer internship as Mistress Amanda’s submissive has been a journey of self-discovery, growth, and intense learning. I am deeply grateful for the opportunity to serve under such an experienced and demanding Domme, and I look forward to seeing where this path will take me in the future.

I wrote a poem for Mistress, and she asked me to share it here as well.

Thank you, Mistress, for your guidance, your discipline, and for showing me the true meaning of submission.

Forever Yours,
Ethan