Playing the Bull: Struggling with Ethics in Extreme Cuckolding Scenarios

Dear Mizz Geena. I’m in a unique threesome with my neighbors, Kayla and Liam. They enlisted me as their “bull” for their cuckolding relationship. At first, I was reluctant, but as they explained what they wanted me to do, I realized it was a pretty great situation for me. She would have me over occasionally, and I’d fuck her while Liam, fully clothed, sat and watched. Once we were done, I was free to go. For me, it was great. Single guy and no-strings sex. But then one time she had me fuck her in the back door. I asked her if she was sure, I’m not super huge by I am fairly wide, and she again told me to fuck her in the ass, so the good guy I am, I obliged. It was hot, and after a few minutes I shot a load in her. At this point we weren’t using condoms – we all had tested, they said they were monogomous, and I promised to test if I fucked anyone else. Neither Kayla nor I liked using them, so we were willing to make concessions.

But after that fucking, Liam treated me differently. It was as if he was angry at me, and he really acted like an asshole. I thought maybe things were over until Kayla invited me over again. But when I arrived, Liam was tied, naked to the chair. I laughed, we fucked, and he fumed. Things got worse between Liam and I after that. I won’t go into specifics, but he did something really underhanded and caused me great loss of property. I was pissed, and when Kayla invited me over, I took the opportunity to take out my anger. Liam was again naked, tied to his chair. But instead of just giving him a show, I made him part of the act.

I fucked his wife up against him. I fucked her while my ass kept rubbing him in the face. when he got angry and yelled in his gag, I slapped him and rubbed my wet cock on his face, smearing my pre-cum and his wife’s juices on him. I was angry, and I leaned into my worst temptations of bullying. But she kept spurring me on – every degrading thing I did to her husband made her even more turned on, and it made me want to do really bad things to him to please her.

I won’t go into more detail, but I did so many bad things to him. She told me he liked it, but now he won’t look me in the eye if we encounter one another outside. The one time he couldn’t avoid me, he simply said “sorry sir” I think I’m playing into their dynamic, but I don’t think I should be that guy. Is it okay to treat another human that way, even if they want it? I keep playing some of the degrading, deviant things I did over and over in my mind, and I go back and forth between being disgusted at myself and wanting to do it more. She said he gets off on it because she is making him submit, and for them that’s their dynamic. And to be fair, it’s not like he’s tied down all the time now – usually when I come over he’s simply on his knees, ready to follow her commands. So, am I justified in treating him this way? Should I stop, or is it okay to lean into it and be the deviant asshole dominant male they both want me to be?

Sincerely,
Torn Bull

Dear Torn Bull,

What you’re experiencing is indeed a complex and intense situation, and I commend you for taking a step back to reflect on your actions and the ethical considerations involved. The dynamic you’ve described between yourself, Kayla, and Liam is one that can blur the lines between consensual play and personal boundaries, especially when strong emotions like anger and power come into play.

1. Understanding the Dynamic: Cuckolding, especially when it involves humiliation and degradation, is a form of consensual kink that can be deeply arousing for all parties involved. For some, the thrill comes from the power dynamics, the loss of control, and the emotional intensity of the situation. However, it’s crucial to recognize that what you’re doing, even in a consensual context, can have significant emotional and psychological impacts on everyone involved—yourself included.

2. Consent and Boundaries: It’s clear that Kayla and Liam have a specific dynamic where Liam’s humiliation and submission play a central role. If this is something that both of them genuinely enjoy and have agreed upon, it can be a valid part of their relationship. However, it’s equally important to ensure that this dynamic is still consensual and that everyone’s boundaries are respected.

The fact that Liam now avoids eye contact and only manages a “sorry sir” when he does see you raises a red flag. It’s possible that what started as consensual play has crossed a line for him, even if he hasn’t explicitly said so. It’s also possible that his discomfort is part of the dynamic they enjoy, but without clear communication, it’s hard to be certain.

3. Your Role and Feelings: Your reflection on your actions—the mix of disgust and arousal—is a strong indicator that you’re wrestling with the morality of your role in this dynamic. It’s crucial to ask yourself whether you’re comfortable continuing in this role. The fact that you’re questioning whether it’s okay to treat someone this way suggests that you might not fully align with this level of degradation and humiliation, even if they both claim to enjoy it.

4. Ethical Considerations: In BDSM and kink, consent is the cornerstone of all activities, but so is respect. Just because someone consents to being treated a certain way doesn’t mean that it’s right for you to do so if it conflicts with your own values and ethics. If degrading Liam in this way feels wrong to you, it’s important to honor that feeling.

5. Communication is Key: Before deciding whether to continue, it might be worth having an open conversation with both Kayla and Liam. Express your concerns and ask Liam directly about his feelings. Does he truly enjoy the level of degradation you’re engaging in, or has it crossed a line for him? Make it clear that you want to ensure everyone is on the same page and that you’re not interested in causing genuine harm, even if it’s in the name of kink.

6. Making Your Decision: Ultimately, the decision to continue in this role or step back should be based on your comfort level and ethical considerations. If you feel that this dynamic is harmful or if it goes against your personal values, it’s okay to step away. There’s no shame in deciding that this isn’t the right role for you.

If you choose to continue, it’s important to do so with clear boundaries, open communication, and a commitment to ensuring that all parties are genuinely comfortable with what’s happening. Remember, in any kink or BDSM relationship, the well-being and mutual respect of all involved should always be the priority.

Final Thoughts: Your instinct to question and reflect on this situation is a good one. It’s a sign that you’re not just acting out of impulse but are genuinely concerned about the impact of your actions. Take the time to explore these feelings, communicate openly with Kayla and Liam, and make the decision that feels right for you.

Whatever you choose, make sure it aligns with your values and that it’s something you can live with, both in the short term and the long term.

With understanding and respect, Mizz Geena