Jerk Off Instruction as Punishment: How I Break My Husband’s Will with JOI

The Control of JOI in an FLR: How I Use Jerk Off Instruction to Humiliate and Control My Husband Cody

In my female-led relationship (FLR) with my husband Cody, control is everything. One of my favorite tools of domination is Jerk Off Instruction, or JOI. While I know Cody loves to masturbate like most men, I’ve found a way to turn that pleasure into something completely different—something that humiliates, degrades, and reminds him that I control his every move. JOI isn’t just about making him cum; it’s about asserting total dominance over his body, even in the most intimate of moments.

By controlling when and how Cody is allowed to masturbate, I reinforce his submission to me. Sometimes, I allow him to release, but it’s not about his pleasure. Instead, it becomes a humiliating, mechanical act designed to leave him feeling exposed and powerless. Today, I’ll share how I use JOI as a punishment and form of control, ensuring that even his orgasms are under my command.

Why Use JOI as Punishment?

Jerk Off Instruction is typically used to guide a man toward orgasm as a reward, but I’ve twisted this dynamic in my FLR. For Cody, JOI is not something he looks forward to. Instead, it’s a form of punishment and humiliation. It’s not meant to feel good—far from it. In fact, JOI is about stripping away the pleasure of masturbating and turning it into something that serves me.

Whether Cody has been in chastity for a while or simply isn’t allowed to cum, there are times when I make him masturbate just to drain him of his energy. This keeps him focused on me and prevents him from getting any real enjoyment from the experience. By controlling his body, I deepen his submission and remind him that I own his cock, his pleasure, and his humiliation.

The JOI Punishment Session: Step-by-Step

If you’re curious about how to turn JOI into a punishment, here’s my detailed guide for making sure your submissive doesn’t enjoy a second of it. The goal is to humiliate him, control him, and strip away the pleasure of something he thinks is “fun.”

Step 1: Set the Scene

Begin by establishing a clear power dynamic. I usually have Cody strip naked and kneel before me, his hands behind his back. If I feel like being extra controlling, I’ll tie his hands or use a chastity cage before the session. This initial setup reminds him of his place: vulnerable, exposed, and completely under my control.

Verbal Command:
“Kneel down, strip, and keep your hands behind your back. I decide what happens to your cock, not you.”

Step 2: Slow, Dull Strokes

I never let Cody start by enjoying himself. Instead, I give him boring, mechanical instructions to make sure there’s no pleasure involved. I’ll order him to stroke himself slowly—so slow that he couldn’t possibly get excited.

Instruction:
“Take your cock in your hand and start stroking, but make it slow. This isn’t for you to enjoy. Keep your strokes steady, just like that.”

Step 3: Self-Harm

One of the key steps in making JOI a punishment is incorporating self-harm. I’ll have Cody slap his own cock or balls at intervals during the session, ensuring that any hint of pleasure is replaced by pain. This adds another layer of humiliation, as he’s forced to harm himself on my command.

Instruction:
“Now, slap your cock. Harder. I want to hear it. Slap your balls too. Don’t stop until I say so.”

The sharp pain from slapping his cock and balls will make it impossible for him to get any satisfaction from the strokes. The added layer of self-harm reminds him of his helplessness and the fact that he’s at my mercy.

Step 4: Verbal Humiliation

As he continues his slow, painful strokes, I’ll layer on verbal humiliation. I remind Cody how pathetic he looks, how worthless his cock is, and how he’s only doing this because I command it. The point is to degrade him and strip away any dignity he might still have.

Verbal Cue:
“Look at you. You think this is about your pleasure? You’re nothing but a worthless tool. Keep stroking, and don’t you dare stop.”

Step 5: Increase the Intensity—But Not the Pleasure

As the session continues, I may have him increase the speed of his strokes, but never in a way that allows him to enjoy it. If he shows any signs of pleasure, I slow him down or stop him altogether. The goal is to frustrate him, making him aware that even in this act, he’s not in control.

Instruction:
“Now speed up, but don’t you dare get close to cumming. This is for me, not you. And if I see you enjoying it, we’ll start over.”

Step 6: Push Him to the Edge of Involuntary Orgasm

As Cody’s frustration builds, I push him closer to the edge of orgasm—but without letting him enjoy it. He strokes as commanded, his body betraying him. If he cums before I give permission, the punishment only escalates.

Verbal Cue:
“Don’t you dare cum. If you do, I’ll make you regret it.”

When he finally cums involuntarily, because I simply don’t give him the command, I make him clean up his filth—preferably with his tongue. There’s no greater humiliation for him than being forced to clean up his own mess after losing control. This reinforces my power and makes sure he never forgets his place.

Instruction:
“Now clean up your mess. I want you to taste your nasty filth, and you’re not leaving until my floor is spotless.”

Advanced Punishment: Perform JOI in Front of Others

If you really want to push the humiliation and control to the next level, bring in others who are aware of your dynamic. Having Cody perform a JOI punishment in front of friends or even involving them in giving commands takes the experience from private humiliation to public degradation.

Challenge:

Invite friends who are either aware of or participate in your lifestyle. Make your sub strip naked and perform the JOI session in front of them. Better yet, have your guests take turns giving him instructions, making him even more humiliated by the fact that others are controlling his every move.

Verbal Cue from Guests:
“Faster. Slower. Slap your balls harder. You don’t deserve to touch yourself.”

This level of exposure adds another layer of psychological torment, as your sub knows that others are witnessing his complete and utter submission to you. The shame of performing in front of an audience will deepen his submission.

The Psychological Impact of JOI Punishment

One of the most powerful aspects of using JOI as punishment is the psychological impact it has on your sub. By taking away the pleasure from something as intimate as masturbation, you’re asserting control over his most personal experiences. He’s left feeling humiliated and degraded, knowing that even the act of touching himself is a privilege you can take away at any time.

For Cody, these sessions remind him that I’m not just in control of his orgasms—I’m in control of his body and his mind. It’s not about his pleasure, it’s about mine. The JOI punishment leaves him feeling utterly submissive, drained both physically and emotionally, knowing that his cock belongs to me.

Conclusion: JOI as the Ultimate Tool of Control

Using JOI as punishment is one of the most effective ways to assert dominance in an FLR. By stripping away the pleasure of masturbation and replacing it with pain, humiliation, and control, you can remind your sub who truly owns his body. Whether you keep the session private or take it public with an audience, JOI serves as a constant reminder that his pleasure belongs to you—and that you can take it away at any moment.

So, next time your sub thinks he’s in for a bit of fun, remind him that his body is yours, and his release will never come without a price.